The universe can't handle the awesomeness of a Katie Power/Shulkie teamup

This is the most gratuitous Booster ass shot I have ever seen.

No matter what comic he's in, Booster always has the most lovingly detailed rear. I think only Nightwing beats him in the sheer number of butt shots.

Can these two team up forever please? Thank you.

Jay's my favourite JSA member. He's like an awesome and yet amusingly embarrassing grandpa. And his hat is the best.

Unterrifying

Okay, come on now. There's gratuitous, and then there's cheesecake, and then there's this.

After Kara/Lobo (and just before Ollie/Deadman) Jaime/Batman was my favourite teamup from Brave and the Bold. Their personalities are completely different: Batman is dark and broody, while Jaime is fun and happy. He really wants to impress Batman, and Bats is just trying to help him be a better superhero.

Where Batman really shines, in any comic that he appears, is when he's trying to teach/help other superheroes. You would think that since Superman is nice and pure that he would be the one to mentor others, but he really isn't. He has the "Super Family" but this mostly consists of people tangentially related to him (Peej being his otherdimensional counterpart's cousin, Kon being his partial clone) who go off and do their own thing. He doesn't even hang out with Krypto that much. Bats actually mentors and teaches all of his sidekicks (by my count: three Batgirls and five Robins) and is involved in their lives and continues to be involved after they evolve (ex: Oracle, Nightwing). Not only that, but as I said before, he often supports the heroes who don't receive much support elsewhere (Booster Gold, Plastic Man). I'm not a huge fan of his mostly because I prefer my comics to be both funny and optimistic in tone, but I really like him for that.

Jarvis is no Alfred, who can extricate himself from virtually every kidnapping situation, but he tries.

"Damn."

1. I love that Catwoman is so excited to be working with Supes, I love her when she's all happy and funny, as opposed to dark and femme fatale-ish (although I don't m

ind that either).

2. How awesome is her outfit? DC has finally realized that what a woman needs when she is frequently engaged in physical combat is not fishnets or cleavage bearing shirts (cough CANARY cough, I love you but that outfit has got to go), but sturdy boots and an ensemble

that covers everything! I'm not required to suspend disbelief when I look at her: I really believe that this is a good choice for being a cat burglar.

3. I highly recommend Brave and the Bold. Guys, Supergirl teams up with Lobo! And later Aquaman teams up with Etrigan. Granted, I like Jason Blood more than Etrigan, but whatever, he speaks in poetry so I'm down with that.

Okay Dick, I see that you're having a case of selective memory loss. Apparently you've forgotten that:

A) You were like 10 when you started working with Batman, so you can't really throw stones in this situation.

B) You're training a 10 year old psychopath, which is a recipe for disaster if I've ever heard one. Also, in this situation, said 10 year old psychopath attacked a dude before realizing that this would cause a building to blow up. This sounds like recklessness to me.

C) Before Steph was the new Batgirl, she was Robin. And before she was Robin, she was Spoiler. I think she's pretty much earned your trust.

While I find this hilarious, it is also an extremely unsatisfying conclusion to my ship. I guess it's back to shipping Herc and Namora. And Shulkie and Aquaman, even though that will never happen.

Wow, Booster. That is...some hair you've got there.

There's just something so charming about this panel. Poor C-list villain...you'll never get the respect that you so crave.

THE LITTLE CHIBI VILLAINS ARE SO CUTE! Catwoman (unfortunately not pictured) was the cutest, but I also love Mr. Freeze there (his gun shoots ice cream) but of course, I would be remiss if I didn't mention little Lex riding on adorable/ugly Doomsday.

Y: The Last Man was otherwise pretty flawless though

The Shulkster's second fastball special! I guess this means she's stronger than Herc, making her probably the third strongest hero in the MU, after the Hulk and the Thing. She's awesome.

You have to use the fastball special wisely though. The consequences can be dire.

Out of all the stupid horror movie tropes, this is probably the stupidest. If you're talking to someone and they look at some point over your shoulder and go "don't hurt her" would you A) act confused and ask what's going on, or B) LOOK BEHIND YOU? Come on, Allison, you're smarter than that.

For a split second when I read this, I thought Dick was just being a dick to Damian. Like, "Yeah? Well YOUR MOM'S paramedics are here." Then I realized that, yes, Talia probably did instantaneously hear about her son's injuries and send her own paramedics.

I also like the Tin Soldier segment

If you were going to make a joke about the Greek gods' choices in sexual partners, you could do a lot better than a homosexuality joke. For instance, you could talk about Zeus's penchant for fucking anything with four legs, or his penchant for fucking his relatives.

Hey, I love Fantasia 2000. Rhapsody in Blue and Carnival of the Animals were great.

My favourite part of Superman/Batman was Superman's unexpected snark streak. He's kind of like Betty White on Golden Girls: you think he's so sweet and innocent and then BAM snark attack! It works especially well since Batman (when not written by Joe Kelly at least) is so humourless.

Pink pants

I get that Shulkie's supposed to be sassy and sexy, but that doesn't seem to be the best outfit of choice to argue in court.

Not to mention, that's a lot of boobage for a prestigious job like She-Hulk's.

I love Parademon. He's so perceptive. I'm sad he's only in the first mini. Now that I think about it, I love anyone and anything out of Apokalips. I love Barda, I love Mr. Miracle, I love Parademon, and I'm fond of all the Furies (especially Granny Goodness). I even enjoy reading about Darkseid.

The Lukey or the tiger?

Don't ever tell me Luke Cage isn't the most awesome hero of all time: HE PUNCHED

A TIGER IN THE NECK. The confused "ROWR?" is just the icing on the cake.

And here, in a nutshell, is why I love Joe Kelly as a writer: Plastic Man as Flash being crushed by his long lost son who has taken the shape of a giant dinosaur. The sound effect, coupled with the giant dinosaur rear end and just the boots showing is the best. That panel could not be more perfect.

There's so much about this that I love. Zatanna's no doubt hilarious story, Ollie and Clint's battle of the trick arrows (seen over Zatanna's head in panel 1), Shulkie cheering on arm wrestlers, and perhaps most of all, Guy being yelled for his dirty thoughts by Moondragon, who is probably stronger than he is, even with his power ring.

Starfox: Sketchiest "good guy" in the Marvel universe

Hahahahaha, oh, how I love journalistic jokes! Here's an example of how screwed up journalists are. This woman is from Y the Last Man. She finds Yorick and makes him strip naked and hold a copy of her paper so she can write an article about the last man on earth and has the picture for proof. 355 and Yorick go after her to get the photos. She threatens them with a gun and I'm 90% sure she gets thrown out a window AND SHE STILL DOESN'T GIVE UP. She's supposed to be seen as insane and selfish, but I was kind of rooting for her. She has the kind of journalistic balls I wish I had.

This is the look of a guy who knows he's about to get his ass beat by the strongest woman in the Marvel universe and there is nothing he can do about it.

I always squee when Darkdevil shows up, but I can't really explain why. He's just such a blatant and unrepentant dick that he veers into self-parody. I think he's hilarious. There is NOTHING nice about him and he's so smug and over the top.

This is a legitimately cute outfit for Karen, and look at that, IT COVERS HER BOOBS

. I love her boots.

On the one hand, I love dogs and this makes me sad. But on the other THERE IS A GUY WHOSE SOLE POWER IS WELDING DOGS TO PEOPLE. "Who the hell welded this fraggin' dog to my butt?" will never not be hil

arious.

Nick Fury always looks awesome. Doesn't matter who's drawing him.

It takes him four steps just to put on his mask

Now I know this featureless face is the Question's

schtick, or whatever...but it seems way

easier to just wear a mask.

That is the saddest human transformed into a werewolf transformed into a talking dog who is known as a Stargod that I have ever seen.

The thing with She-Hulk and Stargod bothered me because first of all, he didn't like her in her She-Hulk form, and if you're going to marry someone, you should accept every part of them, you know? Second, lots of people called Jen a hypocrite in that she didn't like John in his Stargod form. Think about it for a second: the difference between the two situations is that only one is committing bestiality here.

There's just something that really tickles me about the phrase "That's why you get the medium bucks."

In other news, I'm going to cheat on my new husband, the Condiment King, with Slyfox, who I persist in calling Slylock Fox in my head.

Counterparts

I've noticed that DC and Marvel tend to have counterparts of each other. The characters may not be exactly the same, but they fulfill the same role. In the next few days, I'm going to compare some and declare who is better.

Lobo/Punisher
They both fulfill the role of: The Ultra Violent Scary Man
Similarities:
-Look out for themselves
-One of the most feared men in their respective universes
-Brawny
-Ruthless and violent

Punisher is the stricter definition of the word “badass.” Everyone is scared of this dude. Everyone. Even dudes with healing factors. When he shows up, the comic gets serious. He is also human, which makes him more badass. From what I’ve read, he’s gone up against Alex Hayden, Outlaw, Deadpool (?) and the Runaways. He is probably the most serious Marvel character. Lobo, on the other hand, is supposed to be a caricature of the 90ss antihero, while Punisher is an unironic dark antihero. Lobo is so over the top he becomes cartoonish. He refers to himself in the third person as “the main man” which I love. He also has crazy red eyes and facial hair. I prefer him because I find him to be funnier. His appearance in Blue Beetle made that issue one of my favourites.
Winner: Lobo for DC.

Barda/She-Hulk
They both fulfill the role of: The Fun Female Bruiser
Similarities:
-Very tall
-Very strong
-Fun at parties

Barda is a female Fury from Apokalips who escaped, married Mister Miracle, and attempts to live a normal life. She is easily one of the strongest and bravest members of the JLA. Whenever she appears in a comic, it is awesome. No exceptions. She was the best part of the revamped Birds of Prey. She-Hulk is also cool. I can’t say that whenever she appears it is awesome, but that’s only because I’ve read way more She-Hulk than I have Barda. She-Hulk is interesting because she was changed so drastically (as a result of a blood transfusion from Bruce Banner) but it actually made her life better. She would be slightly more fun than Barda at a party. I have to give it to Barda for a few reasons. One, her relationship with Scott is the best relationship in comics. Two, I recently read a comic in which She-Hulk kinda sorta regretted not fucking her cousin the Hulk (slightly makes sense in context…but also not). Three, She-Hulk is overly angst-y sometimes whereas Barda never is.
Winner: Barda for DC.

Guy Gardner/Wolverine
Both fulfill the role of: The Short-Tempered Brawler
Similarities:
-Short-tempered (obviously)
-Confrontational
-Strategy is not a strong suit

Guy is my favourite Green Lantern. He fucking loves being a superhero, and that’s really refreshing. His relationship with Ice is also very, very sweet. However, he loses points for the worst haircut in comics. He’s up against Wolverine though, so that’s not saying much. I like Guy because he also shows his softer side every so often (with Jaime Reyes and Ice). I can’t say anything about Wolverine that hasn't already been said, except that I have never really liked him as much as everyone else seems to. However, he’s always funny when he shows up in other comics because he’s so grumpy. His confrontation with Molly in Runaways and the time he explained the fastball special to She-Hulk were both hilarious. Both have really good voice actors (on Batman: The Brave and the Bold and Wolverine and the X-Men). I’m giving this to Guy though. One, his relationship with Ice, as I said, is very sweet. Two, he was never not awesome in Blue Beetle. Three, ONE PUNCH.
Winner: Guy Gardner for DC.

Krypto the Superdog/Monkey Joe the squirrel
They both fulfill the role of: The Pet
Similarities:
-They are not human.

Krypto has a little cape and he was drawn beautifully by Francis Manapul. Also, he lifted a car with his teeth. HOWEVER, Monkey Joe fought Doctor Doom and won and was eventually killed by a leather fetishist Doom impersonator. I think we all know who has to take the prize.
Winner: Monkey Joe for Marvel.

Today was clearly a DC win, with only the victory of Squirrel Girl’s Monkey Joe keeping this from being a complete landslide. Tune in at a later date when we compare:
Deathstroke/Deadpool
Green Arrow/Hawkeye
Lois Lane/MJ Watson
Wonder Twins/Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver

I was sad when it turned out he was just a Doombot.

Am...am I in heaven?















Doom does not understand your primitive teenage slang!

















Pwned.

But where is Cage's tiara?

Ever wonder where Luke Cage's shirt went after he stopped wearing it?














Wonder no more.

Wolvie and Shulkie are fighting wendigoes when he mentions that his bones are laced with
adamantium.

















I just got the joke.















And that might be the most gratuitous shot of a teenage girl's ass I've ever seen.

Never talk about the fastball special

This is my favourite moment of Incredible Hercules so far. I think Ares is supposed to be a bad guy (yes? No? Antihero?) but this just makes me love him.

















Wolverine has something uncomfortable pointed out to him. I have no idea why Shulkie is dressed like that.















I was so charmed by this for some reason. Thanos as a child looks so hilarious. And he's tackling a stumpadon. STUMPADON. Marvel, never change.














So with that shirt, we're giving up any pretense of Shulkie ever having dignity, huh?

In other news:













Tony Stark hates puppies.
He invented this new "ghost armour" to sneak into Doom's castle. After Doom pointed it out, I realized this was a monumentally stupid move. One of Doom's nemeses is the Invisible Woman. GEEZ, Tony, get it together.

Yeah, boyeeeeeeeee

I was reading over my Dr. Strange post of yesterday, and just realized he has the "greying at the temples" hair like pretty much every Marvel male (and Mr. Lodge from Archie, if I recall). I've never seen that hair on anyone in real life, and yet in Marvel off the top of my head there's Reed Richards, Dr. Strange, Nick Fury, and J. Jonah Jameson. I don't think DC has any that I can recall right now (except maybe Perry White?) Maybe that's the hair Stan Lee wishes he had.

Anyway. So I recently started reading She-Hulk (a little bit of Sensational, but mostly v.1 and v.2). I was IMMENSELY disappointed when I saw that Juan Bobillo was pencilling it, because his work was just painful when he was on Agent X. If you'll recall, here's an example:














Ugh. Alex looks like a gorilla. Sandy doesn't look like herself. I can't recall who did inking, but even that's just bad. It looks like someone left the comic out in the sun and it faded. But I was quite pleasantly surprised when I started reading She-Hulk.















He always draws her with this kind of Daria expression of superiority and boredom on her face all the time that I kind of find charming. He draws her boobs very very large but you know, it's She-Hulk AND it's a comic book, what are you gonna do? I was even a little disappointed when they switched artists. Comparing She-Hulk to Agent X though, I can't believe it's the same penciller. Because I hated every single aspect of his art in Agent X and in She-Hulk my feelings range from "hmm, this is kind of charming" to "you know what? I don't mind it." I would have assumed that he just evolved, but She-Hulk was written (I believe) 3 years before Agent X.
















Context? You can't handle the context.

Things I Find Inexplicably Hilarious

A toad man from outer space yelling "Scarper!"














The fact that Ares' outfit is half Greek god wear and half normal denim.














A loincloth-clad person from the past yelling "DISEMBOWEL HIM!" Way to be specific in your threats.
















Dr. Strange laughing in delight as he is lifted by She-Hulk. From what I've seen of him, he seems almost on another plain than the rest of the characters - you'd never see him just hanging out, or whatever, so when he does something refreshingly normal, I find it very charming. Dr. Strange is another one of those characters that I just LOVE, even though I've hardly seen him in anything. I've only seen him in Cable/Deadpool (and he wasn't particularly noteworthy there) and on Scans Daily. For awhile I kept mixing him up with Mr. Sinister (another character I just love without seeing much of him. That stems purely from his appearance in Cable/Deadpool when he told Deadpool to wash his hands after spending about ten panels peeing). Although it's not too inexplicable, actually. I saw a few pages of a comic on Scans Daily where he teamed up with Spider-Man and he was going about his normal daily routine - checking the fabric of reality for problems - with a coffee and doughnut in his hand.

Also I love him for this:














You wouldn't think the greatest sorcerer in the world would need glasses, but there you go. Dr. Strange is an appealing mixture of you know, ethereal, otherworldly qualities - he's not very accessible as a character, really, when you think about it - and also of the mundane (like the glasses and the fact that he has a coffee and doughnut every morning). I want to read more stuff featuring him. On She-Hulk, a character gets exiled to Duck World (where Howard the Duck comes from) and gets help from Ducktor Strange, a duck version of Dr. Strange (obviously). I think those two need to team up in a mini or something. If they fight my favourite villain (Dr. Doom) and another batshit villain like the Armless Tiger Man and maybe team up with Squirrel Girl, that would be like, my ultimate comic. Nick Fury could join them. Oh man, that needs to be written like, YESTERDAY.