Bye bye, Bats

What I love about this:

1. Superman's kind of confused expression.

2. Kyle's "Oh, Guy...

" facepalm.

3. Batman's analytical "hnn"

4. JOHN'S EXPRESSION OF ABSOLUTE HORROR. You'd think that Cthulhu's tentacles had just emerged from Guy's ass.

This is why Guy's the best GL of all time: he has the balls to moon Batman AND HE WILL DO SO IN SPACE.

Chase is proof that you don't need powers to be a superhero.

Also amusing: the "snik" noise his knife makes. I guess "snikt" is trademarked by Wolverine.

That pantsless suit is so attractive.

Pimp

This dude is PIMPED. OUT. Check out that gigantic gau

ntlet. Also, if I'm not mistaken, he runs his little operation inside the alternate dimensio

n inside Cloak's cloak.

From Batman and Robin, I present to you: Flamingo.

Damian: I expected scary, not gay.

I can't remember this plotline AT ALL, but I love JJ's bling.

This guy has, hands down, the best outfit of all time. Pimp on top, voodoo master on the bottom.

I love these time travelling pimp wolves. Probably the only part of Joss Whedon's run on Runaways that I liked.

I didn't think it could get worse than Dazzler

I'm disenchanted with Joss Whedon for a number of reasons, which is another essay in itself. You would think he would be the best choice to helm Runaways, but that turned out not to be the case. I didn't really mind his whole time travelling plotline, if he DIDN'T JUST COMPLETELY DROP THE PLOTLINE THAT Brian K. Vaughan HAD STARTED. Heinberg's last issue ends with Tony crashing their hideout. And then...nothing. Joss just ignores it. So we never find out why Tony was there. Yes, the transition between writers can be choppy (the worst one I think of right now is the transition on Deadpool between Joe Kelly and Christopher Priest, but at least Kelly wrapped his plotline up first) but I have never read a comic in which the successor just completely drops the established plot. That just seems to show a real lack of respect for the previous writer. It's like Joss is going, "VAUGHAN, YOUR PLOTLINE HAS NO CHANCE OF BEING AS AWESOME AS WHAT I'M THINKING, SO IMMA SCRAP IT COMPLETELY."

But okay, I can deal with that. What I can't deal with is this girl above, who has the power of, I shit you not, dancing on air when she hears music. Sure, she can kick people in the face when she rises in the air, but SERIOUSLY? SHE DANCES. ON THE AIR. Goddamn that's even a worse power than Dazzler's. At least Dazzler parlayed that into a viable disco career that has outlasted disco.

Sure, this is a pretty cute page (especially for a comic in which 99% of it involves punching people or things) but it becomes less cute when you realize that it's been established that Luke Cage weighs 300 pounds and his skin is comparable to steel. So I guess my question is, why doesn't Clair have a broken back? Maybe she's a mutie too. PLOT TWIST.

My brother is currently trying to convince me that Kyle Rayner is the awesomest Green Lantern, but would Kyle calmly extinguish his flaming hair with his fingers? I don't think so! Guy's the man, and he always will be. He's also rockin' that turtleneck. Me likey.

Holy H-E-double hockey sticks, Knockout's hair is roughly the same height as a ten year old child. That's A LOT of hair. I wish I knew her secret to volume.

More Things I Find Inexplicably Hilarious

Cloak freaking out and yelling "I AM NOT YOUR ROLE MODEL!" while Victor stand

s there, stunned. Wow, Cloak, take a Valium.

Superman and Batman flying away just makes me laugh.

Plas getting hyper from three pieces of cake. I also enjoy his multiple exclamation marks.

I don't even really like Wolverine that much

You guys, I just realized that we got Teletoon Retro and I was bored so I watched Superfriends.

It's pretty much the best show ever. In the episode that I watched, three of Superman's villains escape from the Phantom Zone and then proceed to trap the Superfriends in the Phantom Zone in their quest to get revenge on Superman. Here are the highlights:

-Robin's dialogue, which is 99% "Holy ________, Batman!" Also, his shorts.
-The fact that Wonder Woman has an invisible plane, only it doesn't make her invisible so on clear days you can see Wonder Woman zooming around in a sitting position.
-Aquaman's presence, because he does nothing of note.
-A giant octopus thing that attacks the Superfriends in the Phantom Zone, only they just...kind of stand there.
-The Supermobile, which uses giant arms to pick stuff up.
-Superman's random powers, that I don't think are actually canon.
-The music. I'm not even being sarcastic! It's actually really good.
-The villains' plan to sink Australia into the sea, which just consists of them flying up and then crashing into the earth.
-The Wonder Twins' random presence. When the rest of the Superfriends go out, they basically just kind of watch everything. Also, the Superfriends consist of the biggest heroes (and sidekick) in the DCU, and yet...why are the Wonder Twins even there?
-The Wonder Twins' plans to save the heroes. Basically, it is this. Jayna goes, "Form of...Wonder Horse!" and Zan goes, "Form of...ice saddle!" and then they fly to where the villains are. Zan goes, "Form of...liquid nitrogen!" and just spits a bunch of liquid nitrogen at the villains, who get frozen in ice. Jayna is so happy she licks her brother's face, which melts the ice block instantly. It's all very scientific.

I also watched Spider-Man. I don't remember much, except there's a villain who laughs really weird, and the line, "We have to blot Blotto before he blots us!" Oh, and my favourite part. The villain can make people freeze (or something, wasn't really paying attention) so Spider-Man pretends to be frozen. While the villain is gloating, Spidey punches him right in the face. It's genuinely awesome.














I read this book and FYI, it totally romanticizes running away. This kid randomly decides to live in the mountains. If I recall, he has no trouble surviving and his family just...lets him live in the wilderness.














Luke demonstrates the best way to deal with criminals.
Side note: God knows I didn't like his yellow shirt and tiara, but now that he decides to not wear a costume, I have no idea who he is whenever he shows up. He was in Runaways, and I'm like, "WHO THE HELL IS THIS GUY?" They don't need to give him a costume or anything, but if he always wore a wife beater or something, it would be a lot easier.
















Even Tony knows that Wolverine is way too ubiquitous for his own good.

I was sad when it turned out he was just a Doombot.

Am...am I in heaven?















Doom does not understand your primitive teenage slang!

















Pwned.