Wednesday, August 18, 2010

I didn't think it could get worse than Dazzler

I'm disenchanted with Joss Whedon for a number of reasons, which is another essay in itself. You would think he would be the best choice to helm Runaways, but that turned out not to be the case. I didn't really mind his whole time travelling plotline, if he DIDN'T JUST COMPLETELY DROP THE PLOTLINE THAT Brian K. Vaughan HAD STARTED. Heinberg's last issue ends with Tony crashing their hideout. And then...nothing. Joss just ignores it. So we never find out why Tony was there. Yes, the transition between writers can be choppy (the worst one I think of right now is the transition on Deadpool between Joe Kelly and Christopher Priest, but at least Kelly wrapped his plotline up first) but I have never read a comic in which the successor just completely drops the established plot. That just seems to show a real lack of respect for the previous writer. It's like Joss is going, "VAUGHAN, YOUR PLOTLINE HAS NO CHANCE OF BEING AS AWESOME AS WHAT I'M THINKING, SO IMMA SCRAP IT COMPLETELY."

But okay, I can deal with that. What I can't deal with is this girl above, who has the power of, I shit you not, dancing on air when she hears music. Sure, she can kick people in the face when she rises in the air, but SERIOUSLY? SHE DANCES. ON THE AIR. Goddamn that's even a worse power than Dazzler's. At least Dazzler parlayed that into a viable disco career that has outlasted disco.

Sure, this is a pretty cute page (especially for a comic in which 99% of it involves punching people or things) but it becomes less cute when you realize that it's been established that Luke Cage weighs 300 pounds and his skin is comparable to steel. So I guess my question is, why doesn't Clair have a broken back? Maybe she's a mutie too. PLOT TWIST.

My brother is currently trying to convince me that Kyle Rayner is the awesomest Green Lantern, but would Kyle calmly extinguish his flaming hair with his fingers? I don't think so! Guy's the man, and he always will be. He's also rockin' that turtleneck. Me likey.

Holy H-E-double hockey sticks, Knockout's hair is roughly the same height as a ten year old child. That's A LOT of hair. I wish I knew her secret to volume.

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