Wednesday, June 30, 2010

I was sad when it turned out he was just a Doombot.

 I in heaven?

Doom does not understand your primitive teenage slang!


Saturday, June 26, 2010

But where is Cage's tiara?

Ever wonder where Luke Cage's shirt went after he stopped wearing it?

Wonder no more.

Wolvie and Shulkie are fighting wendigoes when he mentions that his bones are laced with

I just got the joke.

And that might be the most gratuitous shot of a teenage girl's ass I've ever seen.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Never talk about the fastball special

This is my favourite moment of Incredible Hercules so far. I think Ares is supposed to be a bad guy (yes? No? Antihero?) but this just makes me love him.

Wolverine has something uncomfortable pointed out to him. I have no idea why Shulkie is dressed like that.

I was so charmed by this for some reason. Thanos as a child looks so hilarious. And he's tackling a stumpadon. STUMPADON. Marvel, never change.

So with that shirt, we're giving up any pretense of Shulkie ever having dignity, huh?

In other news:

Tony Stark hates puppies.
He invented this new "ghost armour" to sneak into Doom's castle. After Doom pointed it out, I realized this was a monumentally stupid move. One of Doom's nemeses is the Invisible Woman. GEEZ, Tony, get it together.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

And a lot of things with four

What I like most about The Incredible Hercules is that instead of just focusing on Hercules' drinking and brawling ways, the writers tie actual mythology into the stories. Of course, if you start doing that, there's no way you can avoid addressing the Greek gods' tendency towards incest and bestiality.

I cut off what Hercules is saying at the bottom there. It's something like, "that's why she has no sexual urges...."
It's not just in The Incredible Hercules that this happens, either.

Deadpool is even subjected to hearing about it. The bestiality comes up a surprising number of times.

Hercules doesn't like it when Snowbird brings up uncomfortable truths.

And for something not really related:


Sunday, June 20, 2010

Yeah, boyeeeeeeeee

I was reading over my Dr. Strange post of yesterday, and just realized he has the "greying at the temples" hair like pretty much every Marvel male (and Mr. Lodge from Archie, if I recall). I've never seen that hair on anyone in real life, and yet in Marvel off the top of my head there's Reed Richards, Dr. Strange, Nick Fury, and J. Jonah Jameson. I don't think DC has any that I can recall right now (except maybe Perry White?) Maybe that's the hair Stan Lee wishes he had.

Anyway. So I recently started reading She-Hulk (a little bit of Sensational, but mostly v.1 and v.2). I was IMMENSELY disappointed when I saw that Juan Bobillo was pencilling it, because his work was just painful when he was on Agent X. If you'll recall, here's an example:

Ugh. Alex looks like a gorilla. Sandy doesn't look like herself. I can't recall who did inking, but even that's just bad. It looks like someone left the comic out in the sun and it faded. But I was quite pleasantly surprised when I started reading She-Hulk.

He always draws her with this kind of Daria expression of superiority and boredom on her face all the time that I kind of find charming. He draws her boobs very very large but you know, it's She-Hulk AND it's a comic book, what are you gonna do? I was even a little disappointed when they switched artists. Comparing She-Hulk to Agent X though, I can't believe it's the same penciller. Because I hated every single aspect of his art in Agent X and in She-Hulk my feelings range from "hmm, this is kind of charming" to "you know what? I don't mind it." I would have assumed that he just evolved, but She-Hulk was written (I believe) 3 years before Agent X.

Context? You can't handle the context.

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Things I Find Inexplicably Hilarious

A toad man from outer space yelling "Scarper!"

The fact that Ares' outfit is half Greek god wear and half normal denim.

A loincloth-clad person from the past yelling "DISEMBOWEL HIM!" Way to be specific in your threats.

Dr. Strange laughing in delight as he is lifted by She-Hulk. From what I've seen of him, he seems almost on another plain than the rest of the characters - you'd never see him just hanging out, or whatever, so when he does something refreshingly normal, I find it very charming. Dr. Strange is another one of those characters that I just LOVE, even though I've hardly seen him in anything. I've only seen him in Cable/Deadpool (and he wasn't particularly noteworthy there) and on Scans Daily. For awhile I kept mixing him up with Mr. Sinister (another character I just love without seeing much of him. That stems purely from his appearance in Cable/Deadpool when he told Deadpool to wash his hands after spending about ten panels peeing). Although it's not too inexplicable, actually. I saw a few pages of a comic on Scans Daily where he teamed up with Spider-Man and he was going about his normal daily routine - checking the fabric of reality for problems - with a coffee and doughnut in his hand.

Also I love him for this:

You wouldn't think the greatest sorcerer in the world would need glasses, but there you go. Dr. Strange is an appealing mixture of you know, ethereal, otherworldly qualities - he's not very accessible as a character, really, when you think about it - and also of the mundane (like the glasses and the fact that he has a coffee and doughnut every morning). I want to read more stuff featuring him. On She-Hulk, a character gets exiled to Duck World (where Howard the Duck comes from) and gets help from Ducktor Strange, a duck version of Dr. Strange (obviously). I think those two need to team up in a mini or something. If they fight my favourite villain (Dr. Doom) and another batshit villain like the Armless Tiger Man and maybe team up with Squirrel Girl, that would be like, my ultimate comic. Nick Fury could join them. Oh man, that needs to be written like, YESTERDAY.

Sunday, June 13, 2010

I'm glad I didn't read comics in the 90s

I enjoy this because these are (almost) all actual versions of Superman. Like on the left there, that's the original "S" shield. The blue Superman was used I think once. There's good old 90s Superman with his mullet. I'm confused about the blonde one and the Indian one, though. And the red one.

I...I can't stop starting at Flash's crotch. HOLY CRAP. You'd think Liefeld was drawing this or something.

I was just talking to my brother about how you almost never see DC superheroes out of costume, and here's why. Wonder Woman just looks OFF in civvies. I enjoy that she appears to keep the tiara and bracelets on 24/7 though.

Friday, June 11, 2010

The Silver Surfer is actually kind of funny

"Yeah Liz! These are the good mutants! Just ignore how rageful they all look and how Wolverine looks like he wants to rip your head off. Join us!"

Just a tip, guys...if you want to recruit someone to be in the X-Men, smiling might be more effective.

For some reason, there is nothing more hilarious to me than the Silver Surfer with a Magic Bag on his head.

There have been lots of jokes made about Tim and Connor's sexuality. I am not a slasher. I have never been a slasher. I didn't even notice homosexual subtext to Wiccan and Hulkling's relationship in Young Avengers, and they turned out to be CANONICALLY gay. But I don't see how else you can interpret Connor inviting Tim into a hot tub when he is (presumably) naked.

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Nicky Fury Is Awesome

You know why? Because he looks amazing no matter who is drawing him.
How about Brent Anderson, whose art I didn't really enjoy and whose renditions of Jessica made her look like she was melting?

Awesome! Danny looks a little weird though.
What about Nick Fury as a hologram?

What about a photorealistic Nick Fury, when photorealism usually freaks me out a little bit?

Awesome! He actually looks like Ben Browder here, and I honestly couldn't visualize him playing Nick Fury but now that I've seen it, that's ALL I can visualize playing Nick Fury in a movie.

No one bitch slaps Nick Fury and gets away with it! Sleep with one eye open, Cap!

Sunday, June 6, 2010

Mark Bagley

I have the feeling that I'm in the minority here, but...I hate Mark Bagley's art. I don't deny that he is talented in the technical aspect of art. But there's a different between being technically correct and being aesthetically pleasing.

Don't believe me?

They both look like they're having strokes and then look at Luke's eyes in the third panel. THEY'RE LOOKING IN DIFFERENT DIRECTIONS.

Luke is...passable here (his mouth looks a little weird though). But there's just something weird going on with Jessica. With Bagley's art, I can't define what is wrong with it, except it's just FREAKISH. There's something with the lips though, those always look weird. Jessica just looks like she's dead or dying here. I like the attention to detail with the hair though. I think as long as he's not drawing faces then he's okay.

It might just be that he can't draw women though. Because even from Ultimate Spider-Man I recall being freaked out by MJ and Gwen, but not so much by Peter or Kingpin or that friend of Flash's or Harry. But then again, Luke Cage looks weird most of the time, and Ben Urich is looking the worse for wear.

Anyway, looking at the picture above, I remember not liking the depiction of Jessica here, but it looks fine now. (I just checked out the bigger picture and I know why I saved this image: Jessica' eyes are two different sizes. Bagley does this A LOT.) JJJ looks great though. And he was consistently great throughout The Pulse (which is where these images were taken from). So I guess there was no point putting this picture in, except JJJ kinda looks like Nick Fury and that makes me happy.

So about consistency: sometimes Bagley's depictions of women are really pretty, like this:

See? Pretty! (I left in the Jonah heads for the WTF factor. I particularly like the one on the right. There are a million things that look could be signifying)

I hate most of Bagley's art, but I haven't seen a portrayal of Spider-Man that I enjoy more than his:

I haven't seen a lot of his portrayals of costumed characters so I can't say for sure, but I think Bagley's strength does lie with the costumes. His drawing of the Green Goblin in The Pulse was very creepy and well done, and every time he draws Spider-Man in Ultimate Spider-Man, it's awesome.

But still, I haven't read an artist that fills me with such visceral...something. It's not really dislike, because like I said, some of his art is really good. I don't really know. But look at the drawing of Jessica laying on Luke's chest again. I think I physically recoiled when I saw that. Not even Liefeld does that to me, except I find his art more funny than anything. I think I have to see more of Bagley's stuff to make a more informed judgment.

Saturday, June 5, 2010

Release the Drop Bears!

I love Nextwave, because it features robots getting their heads eaten by drop bears.

Side note: I realize this is a common sentiment, but Stuart Immonen's art is amazing. Proves you don't need to use photorealism to get expressive faces.

I like DC, but no one does mass fight scenes like Marvel.

What DC does have, though is stupid names. Wildebeest Society?