Party at the Frees

Guys. Mr. Miracle's solo series is AMAZING. Admittedly, I only really like it when Barda's there, but she's in almost every issue so the point is moot. Vol. 1, written by Jack Kirby is great of course, but the nice thing about Mr. Miracle is that as far as I can tell (I haven't read much beyond the Kirby run) is that it retains the original characterization and quality. Take this issue by Doug Moench, in which Barda throws a party, which is as awesome as it sounds:

Things I love about this: 1) J'onn's civvies. 2) Ted uses his millions to buy designer lampshades for the purpose of partying. 3) Kil is confused about party lingo (and who is he talking to?). 4) Is Oberon hitting on Fire? That's the most random pairing I've seen since I read a JSA comic with Wildcat and Catwoman and started shipping them.

I'm not totally sure why, but Kilowog and Ted on the right there crack me up EVERY time. I think it's because everyone else is having a laid back evening chatting about stuff, while Ted just desperately wants to be at a rowdy party. Also, J'onn surrounded by women reminds me of the part in Formerly Known As the Justice League where Batman jokes that "Martian pheromones. The women go absolutely wild."

It's not a party until two feral Mr. Miracles with a hate-on for the JLA show up.

The party parts are amazing enough, but we're not even getting into the actual plot, which involves an Albanian noodle monster (EXACTLY what it sounds like) turning Mr. Miracle and his protege/mentee/not sure, Shilo, into feral monsters. Barda turns Scott back into himself by threatening to divorce him, but this still leaves the matter of the noodle monster. Guy, Ice, and Fire take care of him by, well...

For some reason "I should be al dente!" makes me laugh so hard. I'm not sure which my favourite villain solution is: this, or when Deadpool defeated Tasky by dancing.

Oh, and:

Next time I go to the Dance Cave, I'm going to do this move while shouting "Now you're doing the Blue Beetle Bump!" Trust me, that's not going to be the weirdest thing that ever happened at the Dance Cave.

I've never really looked at the background in any depth, but now that I have there are some things I like. Kilowog is apparently slow dancing with Mama Mound while everyone is dancing to what seems to be an upbeat song, that guy who I'm assuming is a New God over to the left, J'onn dancing by himself, and Guy making a platform appear for no other reason than that he probably just wants to be above everyone else, because that's the kind of amusing jerk that he is.

I've played piano for close to 15 years, and I have never seen that music symbol in the middle there that looks like it's a Chinese symbol. I'm going to assume that's some kind of Apokalips musical notation.

I've always wanted to say that

I...can't say the same there, Dick.

My favourite part of this is the stoic security redshirt guy, who has ALSO wanted to say "Head 'em up, move 'em out."

I love La Dama's character. She's a badass crime lord...but she also genuinely loves Brenda and has her geeky little moments, like here. I was really disappointed with her depiction in the Brave and the Bold (an otherwise excellent title). She was boring and useless. Kind of like what Fabian Nicieza did to Outlaw in Cable and Deadpool.

Sound Effect Mania

I've had a bunch of sound effect pictures saved for an epic post, and that time is TODAY, my friends!

Green Goblin is second only to T-Ray (and maybe Typhoid Mary) on my list of most hated villains, but he has some badass sound effects. BWOMF? Come on, that's awesome. If I ever write comic books, I would have so much fun making up the most random sound effects.

Plus I love puns.

Booster Gold/Donkey Kong crossover: SO WRONG, IT'S RIGHT.

I'm sorry, but I have NO IDEA what KRAKKA KRAKKA FOOM is supposed to sound like in real life. Maybe the FOOM part, but not the

KRAKKA KRAKKA.

Ditto for RRAKKOOOO. Half

the time I think the writers are just fucking with us with some of these sound effects.

PS: I like that Hal/Parallax says "Gnats" when something goes wrong.

Like RUMP? Come on, that's a noun, not a sound effect. Parenthetically, I have no idea what comic this is from. I should label my pictures better.

So that's the sound that grabbing a hidden recorder from a dbag in a weird looking wetsuit makes.

If you've ever wondered what it sounds like when your fake parents from another universe make a cake come into existence out of thin air...now you know.

On the other hand, this is a great representation of what it would sound like to get your heart removed by Zombie Ted.

Fred Van Lente is, hands down, the king of sound effects. Sproy bloom? It makes NO SENSE but it's AWESOME.

PS: This is my only exposure to Namora, and I LOVE HER despite the fact that she is for some reason in love with her cousin Namor, he of the Spock eyebrows and scaly Speedos.

Edit: Apparently Namor and Namora are NOT related by blood, making her crush less uncomfortable. I still ship Namora/Herc though.

Awesome armour is awesome

I'm not a huge fan of Tony but LOOK AT THAT. He gets plopped down in a pacifist, non-

technological village with like, a broken leg and shit, and he makes steam powered armour to fight an assassin. He may be an asshole, but you can't deny he has style.

This is simultaneously creepy and adorable.

Wow Ted. That is...some outfit. Like someone on Scans Daily said "Those outfits undoubtedly cost a lot of money, which means that Ted thinks he's oh so fashionable." He needs some fashion advice from someone. Maybe Batman.

Nilbog! It's Goblin backwards! This is their kingdom!

Evidently Arnold from Troll 2 has made an appearance. "They're eating her. Then

they're gonna

eat me. Oh my GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!"

I love Jon's expression. He's like, "Please don't look at me, please don't look at me, please don't look at me..."

I think Dr. Doom is probably the first villain to realize that spiders are NOT insects. They are in fact, arachnids. He truly is the smartest person in the Marvel U.

Release the Drop Bears!

I love Nextwave, because it features robots getting their heads eaten by drop bears.

Side note: I realize this is a common sentiment, but Stuart Immonen's art is amazing. Proves you don't need to use photorealism to get expressive faces.

















I like DC, but no one does mass fight scenes like Marvel.















What DC does have, though is stupid names. Wildebeest Society?

Beat Panel Madness

This might be kind of a weird thing to say. But I LOVE beat panels. I think they're so hilarious every single time. They're like a foolproof comedy device. To whit:


















Batman glaring at Jaime while Jaime still has puke around his mouth and then Jaime being sheepish defines his whole persona (and every Batman teamup he has).















Hector: Who?
The fact that Mephistopheles (spoiler) turns out to be an old man who just wants to be left alone makes this, in hindsight, like 3x funnier.


















I just realized most of my beat panels are Blue Beetle. Oh Jaime, WHY DID YOU HAVE TO GET CANCELLED? And now you're with the Titans, and you're not fun.
Anyway, this is one of my favourite beat panels. Dr. Mid-Nite is such a B-lister and he finally gets his chance to mentor a young hero (just like Batman!) and...it blows up in his face.
















This is my favourite. Hal/Parallax is all in evil mode, talking about how he wants everyone to feel fear and then he looks up...and four Beetles and Booster Gold are watching him from inside a little bubble. Dan puts it best: "We're five grown men dressed in bright colours inside a clear plastic bubble set against a rainbow background, Jaime. They saw us." The two beat panels just make it better.














Jaime has just finished explaining a nefarious plan by the Reach, involving manufacturing the memories of this fellow here, whose name I can't recall. I love Danni's reaction, especially when juxtaposed with the tragic hero pose of the red guy.

Chickens are the devil's children

Getting the obvious dick joke over at the beginning...

















I wonder whose schlong is bigger: his or Dr. Manhattan's?

And in the inappropriate laughter category...















I saw this and thought, "Hahahaha, Bart fell asleep when he's supposed to be guarding something!" and then I read the article underneath that, which was talking about Bart's death. Whoops. I still laughed though.

This made me squee with joy:













Jaime has to fight Ted's old enemies, and who do we see but...FIREFIST, THE INCENDIARY MAN! To jog your memory, here's the original, from the 1986 Blue Beetle run:














Best melodramatic villain ever.
















Jaime's certainly correct in his facial expression. I have the same one whenever I'm forced to be within ten metres of chickens. I hate those damn things and I have ample reason to, but those are stories for another day.

I've never heard chickens go "kikiriki" before. Maybe "I'LLSEEYOUINHELLBITCHES", but never "kikiriki."

"Knock knock?" "Who's there?" BOOM.

I'm in a crappy mood, so today will be pictures that make me happy.















It's...it's...DEADPOOL SKRULLS!

If I remember this storyline correctly, they genetically engineered these Skrulls from Deadpool's DNA. So the question that I have is, is that their skin or did they make a bunch of Deadpool costumes for the new Skrulls?

















Not only are there dinosaurs in downtown Manhattan, which is awesome enough, but they are infected with the Carnage symbiote. CARNAGE DINOSAURS. MY BRAIN IS EXPLODING FROM AWESOME.

















Dick Grayson is the first Robin and we share a name (Robin, not Dick) so I've always felt fond of him. Which is why I'm glad he grew up so well!

I'm just trying to ignore the little Robin screaming on the left there.
















I love how Hawkman looks all stoic and Ted and Booster are just beaming. I LOVE THOSE TWO.